|"More monsters! Make more monsters!"
This article is a stub. You can help the Knighton News Network by
|"What have you done, Ava? I can't even remember my middle name!"
The subject of this article is considered non-canon because it doesn't appear in the television series.
I am the Book of Monsters and I love to eat evil books. That's just what I do. The Book of Evil, The Book of Chaos, The Book of Fear - I have devoured these and many more scrumptiously evil volumes. But one menacing masterpiece has eluded me all these years: The Cookbook of Evil. It was written by a Sea Monster pirate named Chef Savage. (Pronounce it like you speak French: "Sa-vahhh-jjj!") His waitors are named Poop and Deck. (Pronounce them like you DON'T speak French: "Poop and "Deck.") For those of us in the Dark Realm, Chef Savage is a virtuoso of culinary arts. He even cooks better than General Magmar! Of course, I don't care about his Lava Souffles or Hemlock Smoothies. I just want to eat his cookbook - oh, those sweet, succulent pages of evil. I would say more, but I'm soooo hungry my drool is making all my words--
He retrained to be a hairdresser for the Forest Monsters. Now he trims the crowns of broadleaf trees, styles beards and moustaches for coniferous plants, and whips up crazy hairstyles for weeping willows. He would even win a hairdressing contest if his clumsy assistants Poop and Deck didn't mistake spray cream for hairspray. I shall now call him: Scaredy Scissorhands.